Giving and Receiving Constructive Feedback Is Your Biggest Growth Hack

We’ve all been there. You have an experience at a business—a restaurant, a local shop, a service provider—and something is a little off. Maybe the service was slow, or the product didn’t quite hit the mark. Do you say something? Most of us would rather just walk away and never come back.

As Tosin mentions in the latest episode, the thought of giving unsolicited feedback can be uncomfortable. But on the other side of that coin, as business owners and professionals, we can’t afford to be in the dark. Without honest input, we can't see the blind spots that are costing us customers and opportunities. The secret isn't just to get more feedback, but to build a culture around giving and receiving constructive feedback effectively.

It's a two-way street that requires as much skill in the delivery as it does humility in the reception. Getting this right can change the entire trajectory of your business, your team's morale, and your own career development.

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"Feedback is the breakfast of champion. It's the way for you to grow in any field that you're in." — Korede

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How to Give Feedback That Actually Gets Heard

The difference between feedback that helps and feedback that hurts often comes down to one word: framing. Simply telling a chef "your food was terrible" is a conversation-ender. It’s a blunt statement that puts the recipient on the defensive and gives them nothing to work with.

Instead, Allen suggests a more thoughtful approach, framing it as an offer to help: "I really think you've got something special here, but if I can give you some feedback that may help… if I’m feeling this way, chances are there are other people who feel the same way." This communicates that you’re on their team and want them to succeed. It opens the door for a real conversation rather than slamming it shut.

For more formal settings, like a workplace, Allen shares a powerful framework: Situation, Behavior, Impact (SBI).

1. Situation: Start by grounding the feedback in a specific moment. ("Yesterday, during our team presentation…")
2. Behavior: Describe the specific, observable action without judgment or opinion. ("I noticed that you kept interrupting the speaker…")
3. Impact: Explain the result of that behavior. ("It made it hard for the rest of the team to follow the main point.")

This method removes personal opinion and focuses on concrete facts, making the feedback less of an attack and more of a collaborative problem-solving session. The goal isn't just to get something off your chest; it's to inspire a positive change. And that requires delivering the message in a way it can be truly heard.

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"As a business owner you have to take the emotion out of it and try to see where they're coming from and take the… meat in what they're saying and not the seasoning so to speak." — Tosin

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The Art of Receiving Feedback Without Getting Defensive

Hearing criticism is never easy. Our natural instinct is to protect our ego. But as Korede reminds us, when it comes to feedback, "perspective is reality." It doesn't matter if your intentions were pure; what matters is how your actions were perceived.

The first step in receiving feedback well is to cultivate the right mindset. Tosin advises starting from a place of humility—accepting that you're not perfect and that no one is trying to tear you down. Assume positive intent. Most of the time, the person giving you feedback wants to see you, your team, or your business improve.

When you get hit with a critique, the work isn't just to listen; it's to understand. Korede urges us to dig deeper. If a client says a new process "sucks," don't just accept the sting of the word. Ask clarifying questions: "Can you elaborate on what you mean? What part of the process is taking too long? Do you have any suggestions for how we could improve it?"

This transforms a potentially negative interaction into a data-gathering mission. You collect the specific pain points you need to go back to the lab and solve the real problem. By separating the "meat" of the message from the "seasoning" of its delivery, you can turn every piece of feedback, good or bad, into fuel for growth.

Ultimately, complacency is the enemy of progress. If you aren't actively and intentionally seeking out feedback, you're not growing. Create spaces for these conversations, be approachable, and remember that the hard truths are often the ones that help you level up the most.

To hear our full conversation on mastering constructive feedback, including more personal stories and tactical advice, watch the full episode on YouTube. And don't forget to subscribe to our newsletter for more insights on business, career, and life beyond the grind.